A Leader's Love.
I love visiting Italy. The history, the art, the food, the culture, the warmth of the people, the weather… It’s my kind of place. I was in my element, then, when my wife and I recently enjoyed a week in Sicily.
During our trip, I was particularly excited to visit an exhibition that included an original Caravaggio painting (Crocifissione di sant’Andrea) opposite the stunning Cathedral in Ortigia. While it was great to see an original Caravaggio piece in the flesh – I love his chiaroscuro contrasts – it was another painting that commanded my attention: Maddalena ai piedi della Croce by Caravaggio’s friend and collaborator, Mario Minniti, which shows Mary Magdalene at the feet of Christ on the cross.
The painting immediately reminded me of some profound insights shared by Ron Heifetz and Marty Linsky in their book Leadership on the Line. The book’s central premise is that leadership is inherently dangerous, meaning that leaders have to take care to stay alive.
Towards the end of the book, having outlined the perilous nature of leadership in bringing about change (often perceived as loss), the authors ask the question, why bother? Why lead?
Leadership, Love and Sacred Heart
The answer is as simple as it is profound: love. Love is the purest motivation to lead. It isn’t self-serving, nor does it operate on the basis of quid pro quo; it’s selflessness through serving others. Love is a doing word, not an idealised notion of effortless romance.
But loving others with an open heart isn’t easy. As Heifetz and Linsky note, it can be tempting to close our hearts to protect ourselves from pain. Cynicism, arrogance and callousness may protect us from pain today, but what about our relationships tomorrow?
Heifetz, who is Jewish, had been reflecting on the meaning of sacred heart, as taught by Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi at a workshop he’d recently attended. During a chance visit to an Anglican church near Oxford, England, he gained deep insight into the meaning of sacred heart through reflecting on Christ’s vulnerability and suffering while on the cross:
“That’s the message. That’s what sacred heart is all about – the courage to feel everything, everything, the capacity to hold it all without letting go of your work. To cry out like King David in the wilderness, just when you desperately want to be believe that you’re doing the right thing, that your sacrifice means something, ‘My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?’ But in nearly the same instant, to feel compassion, ‘Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do.’ Jesus’s heart stayed open. He held it all.”
The authors then go on to define sacred heart as, “the capacity to encompass the entire range of your human experience without hardening or closing yourself. It means that even in the midst of disappointment and defeat, you remain connected to people and to the sources of your most profound purpose.”
Surely we need more sacred hearts to heal our division-ridden societies. We need leaders, without formal title or position, who will have the courage to keep their hearts open and love. Control and manipulation won't cut it. No amount of manipulation, whether through carrot or stick, comes close to having the impact that love does on human hearts and minds.
An Invitation to Love
Love is a better way to lead. It’s forgiveness, not blame. It’s care, not neglect. (More specifically, it’s care for the whole, not just the personal fiefdom.) It’s selflessness, not selfishness. It’s humility, not hubris. It’s truth, not deceit. It’s long-term sustainability, not instant gratification. It’s all that is good.
No one is perfectly loving. We can all feel jaded and negative at times. That’s natural. It doesn’t always feel natural to love either, but it is possible.
Please – take some time to consider what impact an increase of love in your life can have on your self, your relationships and on the contributions that you can make.
Having an open heart isn’t easy. Loving isn’t easy. But love is the only hope we’ve got. Nothing else will do. Your leadership, through love, is needed.
(You can find Heifetz and Linsky's excellent book, Leadership on the Line, through the link.)